How to Make Better Decisions About Your Career?

Making decisions is hard — especially when you’re trying to make big career decisions. This five-step framework can help you focus on what’s important.

1. What are your feelings telling you? Think about the kind of work you’re doing now, or the kind of work you’re planning to do. Brainstorm and jot down ideas of different careers you’re considering. What feelings come up?

2. What matters to you? Take a psychological assessment or complete an exercise that will help you identify your values. Understanding your values will allow you to make choices that align directly with the things you care about.

3. What matters to other people? Just as it’s important to get clear on what matters to you, it’s also important to consider how your decision will impact your loved ones. Ask them for their own thoughts, input, and feelings.

4. What is the reality of the situation? Be objective and consider the realities surrounding your options, not your assumptions. Otherwise, you might end up having false expectations or feeling disappointed by your choices.

5. How do I put the pieces together? Once you’ve answered these four questions, review all the information you’ve just discovered. You should come to your final decision. If you don’t revisit the previous steps.1.

Effect of Peer Pressure and Peer Influence in Children and Adolescence

Making decisions is hard — especially when you’re trying to make big career decisions. This five-step framework can help you focus on what’s important.

Peers are the important component of life of every person, with them we grow, learn, imitate from each other. Many times adolescence are comfortable to share ideas and thought whether it is for good or bad which are uncomfortable to share with parents in their peer group.

Generally, children imitate the behavior of their peers and follow the rules of group where they can be fitted in the group and also to feel the sense of belonging. In this process they learn many things like smoking cigarette, drinking alcohol, bunking classes, maintaining girlfriend or boyfriend, using mobile etc. so that they can show off as a mature adult.

This is the stage where influences of parents and teachers are less and more influence by peers but it is also true that peers influence and peer pressures are not always desirable. This is the stage where parents and teachers need to be very careful because higher number of adolescence learn to watch Pornography and Sexual activities from mobile, showing disobedience towards teacher and parents, bulling others, eve-teasing, stealing, cheating, destructing, aggressing, doing risky things or breaking rules, passing on nasty comments, taunting etc.

Some management techniques like talking to student, making plane for future, provide appropriate information they needed,
sharing our own ideas and experience, teaching how to be assertive etc. will be helpful to them.

How peer influence works?:

1. Learn through imitation: Children and adolescents get to learn by imitating each other whatever good or bad, they see how to behave, how to talk, how to dress, work. Even they learn the way to express their feeling, emotions and aggression. If they got good company, they learn many good things in their lives from their friends and leads to great achievement in academics, sports, extracurricular activities which are very much required for a person in their survival. It is vice versa if they get bad companion and imitates bad behaviours and activities.

2. Sense of belonging: Many times, adolescence feel comfort to share their experience to their close friends who are of their age group or having certain similar traits like classmates, studying in same school, belong to the same place, being neighbors etc. Many times, we can’t deny the fact that children or adolescence do not share everything to their parents or teachers as they do not feel a sense of comfortless. There are many things in life which they feel comfort sharing their experience only to their peers and not to their parents and teachers. For instance, liking of some boyfriend or girlfriend, comments about a teacher, or making fun of someone, inappropriate jokes or pet jokes which they don’t feel comfortable sharing with teachers and parents and can only be shared with their peers and that develops a sense of belongingness.

3. Become more assertive, try new activities.: Young adolescents develops more confidence and belief in himself confining with their peers. If the group members encourage him for certain activities, for instance academic homework, sports, seminar, topic discussion and feel support whenever got insecure from their peer groups and feel happy. At times when they are in distress and feel insulted, they get emotional support from their peers and it becomes one of the coping mechanisms in their life.

4. Choosing the same clothes, hairstyle or jewellery as their friends: Adolescents feel mature by wearing the same clothes, changing their hairstyle and wearing jewellery as their friends do. They feel a sense of updating themselves according to time and new generation. Wearing outdated clothes, traditional hairstyle, jewellery makes them feel a sense of old traditional people. They want to get change and do something different which was not the old tradition. By doing so they feel a sense of individuality and identity and also want to show that they are different now and also can perform more better than the older generation. This kind of activities is encouraged and accepted by their peer group.

5. Listening to the same music or watching the same TV shows as their friends: Youngsters prefer to listen to the same music particularly western songs, pop, rock and roll, metallica and rap. By doing so they feel they are different and feel proud of themselves. They feel a sense of belongingness to each other and also indirectly convey the message to their parent and teachers that they are more stylish, fashionable and up to date with the current trends of society.

6. Changing the way they talk, or the words they use: Youngsters are impressionable and copy language and style of talking which they hear in movies and role models in the form of movie stars. By doing so their command in language improves. They have common role models like film stars, actors and actresses which are acceptable by their group. They are so much influenced by their role models that they copy and start speaking among themselves and derive a sense of pride.

7. Working harder at school: Peer influence are very necessary in the life of everyone. They imitate and learn among themselves. They also learn to contest in academics, sports, extra-curricular activities etc. By doing so they start competition and try to achieve more better than others do. This in turn improves their skills, knowledge, efficiency which are important in
their future life.

Negative Impact of Peer pressure:

Peer pressure or influence is when you do something you wouldn’t otherwise do, because you want to feel accepted and valued by your friends. Peer pressure or influence is when you do something you wouldn’t otherwise do, because you want to feel accepted and valued by your friends.

1. Mobile addiction: Young adolescents used to have mobile of their own as fashion. Smart phones in particular is very impressive to them as it has multiple facilities, they keep on playing video games like PUB G, which has the potential to pose risk in their life. Whenever they get free time, they keep on watching movies, YouTube, adult pictures for hours on end. Binge watching is also a factor which leads to mobile addiction.

2. Smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol: Youngsters in order to conform to group norms engage in health risk behavior such as smoking and drinking. They consider it a sign of a sign of maturity. They feel proud, mature independent and feel equal to adults.

3. Bunking classes/ truancy: Bunking classes can be common amongst adolescents. They feel proud and happy as it accepted by their peer group. Usually, they bunk classes which are not interesting to them and prefer to go to theatre for watching movies. Slowly and gradually, this kind of activity turns into a habit and dramatically harms their career and future progress in the domain of academics.

4. Peer and romantic relationship: Young adolescence learn of indulging romantic relationship from their peers. They become so much curious of knowing what is romance and also feel happy of discussing about their boyfriend/girlfriend. They feel excited to share their experience in the group as this is the first experience of their life. They learn about how the opposite sex talk, dress, socializing etc. They also learn to maintain friendship with the opposite sex and learn about dating.

5. Pornography and Sexual activities: Young adolescence at this stage start watching pornographic films and videos and develop curiosity about sexual activity. Even if one is not interested in pornography, they start indulging in such activities due to peer pressure and to oblige the group.

6. Disobedience towards teacher and parents: At this stage they learn to disobey parents and teachers and more accepting of what their peer group suggest and decide. They are highly influenced by the opinions of the peers and less influenced by their elders in the form of parents and teachers. They are of the opinion that their elders are only there to give advice and suggestion and not more.

7. Bulling: Bullying is a major concern amongst adolescent youth. They learn bullying behavior from their peers to gain acceptance within their peer group. Their fear and apprehension of being isolated from their peer group compels them to indulge in bullying behavior.

8. Eve-teasing: They learn how to pass negative comments towards the opposite sex from their peers and derive pleasure from it. They indulge in hooting and pass derogatory comments in order to feel a sense of belongingness with their peer group.
9. Delinquency: Delinquent behavior amongst adolescent youth is a growing concern which manifests in aberrant behavior such as stealing, cheating and destruction of public property. Often such behavior is learned from peer group members who provide encouragement which intern fuels a vicious cycle of destructive and socially unacceptable behavior.

Techniques which can be overcome from peer pressure:

1. Build up self-esteem and confidence: Children who have strong self-esteem are better at resisting negative peer pressure and influence. They should encourage and teach to say no if they feel that something unwanted things are going to happen. They should encourage to do something new which can lead their life a successful. Parents and teachers required to motivate teenagers to develop more confidence and self-esteem which they can take up their own decision.

2. Keep the lines of communication open: Parents and teacher should not show teenagers that they are busy and do not have time to concern and discuss about their problems. Show curiosity to know about them more ask what is going on in schools, friends, study etc. every day. Try to talk to them and be frank and open so that they can open up their feelings and start sharing to you.

3. Give teenagers a way out: Give time to teenagers and try to solve their issues and problems they face. Once parents and teacher start helping and trying to show some way out then definitely teenagers will build confidence and will start sharing their problems whenever they are on trap. They will start believing that their parents or teacher will solve their problems and start believing as a good friend on the earth.

4. Encourage a wide social network: If the teenagers are confining only in one group, then the scope of changing and thinking broadly will be limited and the support also will be limited but if teenagers have the chance to develop friendships from many sources, like from gym, club, sports, family friends then he will get lots of support from many sources when he goes to wrong direction.

5. Peer pressure and peer influence: Whenever you think teenagers friendship are more and over than what is require then give yourself a time to your family spend time with your kids ask what are the negative pressure from friends or anything unwanted things ask by friends etc. will definitely help to resolve and guide in right direction.

6. Positive relationship: Parents should maintain good relationship with teenagers and also stop criticizing all the time. If parents criticize then teenagers will not open up their feelings and will scare to share to parents. If parents maintain positive relationship, then teenagers will share their peer pressure freely and openly so as to seek help from parents.

7. Judgment: If the parents are judgmental then teenagers won’t share their problems of peer pressure or may be more influence by peers. Always keep the opinion broad and non-judgmental. Suggest what is what properly, tell them clearly what is right and what is wrong to them. Make them realize and give an opportunity to choose of his own.

8. Set Limitations: Parents require to make certain limitations for teenagers like when they go out from home. Teenagers should be taught when to come back home, instruct mom and dad are waiting for dinner, lunch etc. Parents will be worried if they come late so on because this kind of limitations will keep on maintaining the importance of parents and also feel secure that someone is there who care for me and love me.

9. Show confidence: It is important for parents or teacher to show confidence towards teenagers. Let them to play their own path. Encourage them, believe them and motivate them.

Peers influence and peers pressures are natural process, it is require for every person to improve their skills, career, to impart knowledge, to develop confidence. Peers teach us many things in life which parents and teachers can’t teach in family and schools. If teenagers mingle with those peers who are ambitious, well behaved, maintain discipline then they imitate those good qualities and become successful in life and progress more in career.

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